False News

via Daily Prompt: Natty

Had a CO two cartridge gone off? The driver’s side interior of the white SUV was filled to capacity with a nattily dressed woman. The woman of dissimilar proportions sat inside her SUV at the end of Holiday Street. Her intention was clear, capture the dog taking a dump on the lawn. The dog was all gathered up to relieve itself. The woman was late. The dog had already dropped the mother load. She sat in wait while the dog also sat in wait. She got nothing, he delivered nothing. Me, I had already asked a passing police officer for a poo bag, any type of bag. He apologized, his squad car was void of any type of bag, “not even a Walmart bag.” The bag dispenser in the park was empty. What can I say, I used a different pack to carry mail to the post office and had failed to put in a few poo bags. I’m sure the woman’s Facebook page was lit up by comments about the dog walker who allowed her dog to poo without picking it up. The story doesn’t end here, down the street a woman was out dead heading her flowers. I asked for a bag and she gladly provided not one but two. I returned, bagged it, and dropped it in a garbage bin positioned along the street for the Monday pick up. My dog and I moved on. Her Facebook page won’t reflect that. No, I’m sure she was the hero of her story and I was the scourge of society.


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